The Portlander

It’s a Stumptown staple | and as soon as the days got long and sunny here in New York, I started to dream of a land of unlimited salsa and vegan burritos: gooey melty rice cheese, thick leafy spinach, salty black beans, brown rice, and the key member of this ensemble Salsa Verde.  Incarnations are available at Laughing Planet, with spicy tofu at Dots, with mexi-rice @ Honken Huge Burritos, the HaYsTaCk at Paradox, and even Taqueria Los Gorditos has a vegan/ricey somethingorother with guacamole and greens.

And yet, New York City, we supposedly have everything here. I am sure I could find something that mimics this burrito but it would be an impostor, an impersonator (similar to the tragic Stumptown mess brewed at some cafes, shame shame).  The other issue: Manhattan Burrito inflation.  The 3-5 dollar burrito here is a rarity (and often not very good).  So far, I have been happiest with little carts I find here or there.  But their fare is not focused on brown rice and greens but rather carnitas, taquitos and lard.  What about this Green Salsa?  Ex-employees (who have also warned me off the prevalent use of can openers in the LP kitchen, tisk tisk) have explained the ingredients.  Being who I am, I take their explanation and must mess with it.  Hence, this salsa is a bit of a riff on the (more traditional) Salsa Verde with tomatillos, using cucumber instead.  Why? Because I am on a restrictive diet, oh joy of joys.  Nevertheless, although its a little less tart/chunky it still tastes deceptively similar to the green stuff served by the bucket full at many a Portland vegan / earthfriends / crueltyfree / micromade / bikepropelled burrito haunt.

The Portlander | with Green Salsa

• Black Beans (cooked with a pinch of chili powder, cumin and salt)
• Brown Rice
• Fresh Spinach
• Cilantro
• Green Salsa
• Tortilla (flour or corn, depending on your life needs)

Warm-up the tortilla in either a pan or directly over your gas stove top (don’t burn down your apartment building).  Pile all ingredients inside.  If you like, add Monterey jack or pepper jack cheese that comes from a cow or from rice, either way it will enhance your experience.  Dunk, dip, dredge or drown your taco/burrito in Green Salsa.

Green Salsa

• 1 large cucumber, peeled and coarsely chopped
• 1 small clove of garlic
• ½ a small onion, chopped
• 1 jalapeño
• 1 lime
• Salt
• A few leaves of spinach

Place cucumber, garlic, and onion in a food processor or immersion blender and pulse a few times to hack stuff up.  Remove the rind from half the lime and place the whole half in the processor (supreme your lime would be the correct terminology).

Squeeze and add just the juice out of the second half.  I need my salsa mild, so I remove the seeds and pith from my Jalapeño, but you can toss the whole thing in there if you like a kick.  Pulse until everything sticks to the sides or starts to look smoothish.  Add cilantro. Add a little water to reach your desired consistency.  If you don’t like too much cilantro flavor, add spinach for super green good looks.  Salt to taste.  Add cumin if you wish.  If you feel the way I do about this salsa, this is barely enough for two people.  Double it for gatherings, BBQs, chip dippin, or taco nights.

{Bonus Desert Time}

Sugar Free, Wheat Free | Oatmeal Cookies

• 1/2 c. butter, very softened (or diary free butter equivalent)
• ½ cup of light agave 1 tsp molasses (optional)
• 1 egg
• 1 tsp. baking soda
• 1 c. gluten free flour
• 2 1/3 c. oatmeal
• vanilla, raisins, nutmeg and/or cinnamon to taste

Blend and cream butter, brown sugar, egg and vanilla. Add baking soda, flour, oatmeal and raisins. Drop and slightly flatten tablespoon sized chunks on a greased bake sheet. Bake at 350 degrees for 9 minutes for a chewy cookies, 13 or so for something snappier.

Tuck in friendlies,

Alex